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Blind Boy Apollo
and the All-White Astronauts

New Age "Asiatic" thought ... is establishing itself as the
hegemonic ideology of global capitalism. (Zizek)

Thursday, February 19

mysticism for white chicks

Despite strong leanings toward multiculturalism, not all the Not-Really-New-Age crowd (most of whom, of course, are women, and totally New Age) are comfortable with non-Western alternative New Religions -- new to them anyway, such as Santeria, Voodoo, Hoodoo, Macumba, Abacua, Candomble, Palo Mayombe, Umbanda, shit like that. They tend to be uncomfortable with these other paths lest some pow'ful black man come be messin wit dey gris-gris bits.

Paulist Press to the rescue! "Celebrating 142 years of excellence in Catholic publishing," as the website informs us, Paulist offers solace to confused white Americans in search of safe inner weirdness with its Classics of Western Spirituality series.

Chosen with care from that series, what follows is my Top-Ten gallery of solid-platinum First-World Spiritualityism® -- you just can't go wrong with these perennial favorites.

But first, a few brief notes before you start clicking through and buying all these wonderful books for your own personal library, thus assuring me a continued source of intellectual stimulation and much needed protein.

  1. In the first couple items below, note that "Anglo-Saxon" and "Celtic" are code words for White. In fact, "Western" in this context is a code word for White. Don't worry, you're in good hands here. I understand Your Needs.
  2. Angels are always good. How could 74% of Americans be wrong?
  3. Hildegard of Bingen is included because her name always cracks me up. Right up there with Princess Marie von Thurn and Taxis. Call it a personal thing.
  4. Julian of Norwich was a chick. Who knew?
  5. Mostly sunny with clouds of unknowing in the later afternoon.
  6. Meister Eckhart appears twice in deference to his name having been highjacked by Holy Rollah Eckhart Tolle -- though that boy not be preachin in da hood any more than they be rollin Enya loops.
  7. I wanted to add Emmanuelle II, but I guess Paulist Press was out of stock.
  8. The last one is in honor of Madonna's deep spiritual yearnings.
  9. Yes, I had a really fucked-up childhood thanks to the Roman Catholic Church. How did you guess?
  10. One two three four five six seven... all good children go to Heaven.